Its been quite a few months since I’ve written here on DTC, not since January I think. A lot has happened in that time. As I’ve written before – my dad died suddenly at the start of December, It was very traumatic for me, as I’m the one who found him. I already struggled with Bipolar Disorder, Anxiety, and PTSD before that but his death sent me into a downward spiral.
I’ve been in the local psychiatric hospital twice since then – once for depression and the other time for psychosis. I’ve been in outpatient treatment 3 times a week almost continuously since the end of January. The doctors have rotated me on and off different medications, still not finding the correct one and the correct dose to help me. Its also been decided that I will apply for disability and not hold down a job for 2-3 years, as the stress makes me worse. Applying for disability is no small feat and my case is currently in appeal after being rejected the first time.
Mainly my life consists of therapy right now. I have made huge progress with self harm, barely doing it at all. By evening, I’m so tired from therapy and the medications I’m on that I just collapse into bed.
And all of my kindness - mistaken for weakness.StL Girl. Fighting PTSD, Bipolar, and Anxiety. Engaged to the best man a woman could ask for. IT tech in the making, wannabe coder.As simple as a spider's web, as calm as a hurricane.