My Writing is Mean and Offensive.

 Call me a hater.

And what’s wrong with that? From halitosis to hemorrhoids, I can think of lots to hate. People who don’t know the meaning of the word “literally”, yet insist on using it incessantly.

So I’m proud to say my writing is mean and offensive.

I don’t discriminate on the basis of race, ethnicity, gender, sexual orientation, disability, or religion. I don’t care if you’re a three-headed, green hermaphrodite from the planet Pigpen, who worships ham sandwiches. Beyond those few of distinction, proven worthy of my respect, I hate you all.

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I understand the feeling is mutual. Oh, well. Lately, I’ve been getting a lot of hate mail. More to the point, negative comments and messages on Facebook.

It appears my writing is finally getting some attention, at least, if not what it deserves. So I’d like to return magnanimity for malice. I’m really not such a bad guy, after all.

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So thank you for reading my work. Every view puts desperately needed cash in my pocket. It’s too bad Facebook lacks a “hate” button. It would be a badge of honor to see my “hates” climb into the hundreds, the thousands, pray, the millions. As my wallet fattens.

My writing is mean and offensive. Relish or despise it. Get used to it.

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My latest piece, trashing the farce of public school “education”, offends most teachers, naturally. My take on this wrong-headed, divisive “privilege” meme seems to offend most everyone waving a rainbow flag.

Mommy, are leprechauns gay?(image from Pixabay, text original content, rights reserved)

Harsh words, vitriol and sarcasm hold a useful place in the writer’s toolbox. Should I blunt my knife, saw, or hatchet on a stone? That would lessen their effectiveness. So why should I blunt my words?

My writing is mean and offensive when warranted.

If I criticize teachers, sailors, jailers, tailors, or concepts such as “privilege”, I haven’t condemned you personally. Though if you take it as such, perhaps you deserve condemnation.

disgrace-230907_640If I asked, “Who are you?”, would you reply with a job title, or a category such as “Republican”, “lesbian”, “black”, “union member”, “atheist”, “Christian”, “disabled” or “American”?

I don’t. I’m not a group member groupie. More a Renaissance man than merely a writer.  I certainly don’t wrap my identity up in group belonging.

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Practice makes perfect. The next time someone asks you who you are, don’t blurt out the same old, “I’m an office manager.” And, if pressed, go on with the whole laundry list of identity attachments; “I’m an office manager, Democrat, and gay man.” Instead, try something like, “I’m a guy who likes staying up late to watch cheesy horror movies. I go cycling a lot, love dogs, and hanging out late in clubs or at concerts on the weekends. Oh, by the way, I work as an office manager, tend to agree with the Democrats, and happen to be gay.”

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My writing is mean and offensive. If you take that personally, I feel sorry.

Signing off,

Runbum

(images from Pixabay)


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